The only reason Lily isn't so heavily vilified by the fandom despite how toxic the character actually is, is because Alyson Hannigan is such a likeable and charismatic actress.

Marshall was 6’4 handsome lawyer with exceptionally high morals. He’s definitely the one settling, doesn’t really go much further than that.

The not talking about that debt before getting married really gets me. Not because debt is automatically bad, but being able to talk about it, especially before you legally hitch your lives and assets, is just kind of what adults need to do

A soft-spoken mountain of a man, ruggedly handsome, affable, intelligent, well-educated, humble enough for Minnesota but strong enough to survive in New York. Has a goofy side to him, but knows when to be serious. Handy, hard working, comes with a huge family of some of the best people you'll ever meet.

I think the biggest thing to consider is that Ted is the one who portrays them as a "perfect couple" because that's all he WANTS to see.

For me it was the money thing. She was a shopaholic who guilted Marshall into paying her debts while also judging him for the work he did to pay it off!

Marshall is literally the only redeemable character and he’s too good for allll of his friends lol

there’s a point where barney says “your wife is pure evil a puppet master” something along those lines to marshall and he was shocked

There are a few other things that show just how bad Lily is:

I feel like Lily's popularity is mostly because of Alyson Hannigan's portrayal. If she had been played by a less charismatic actress, I doubt fans would have been as forgiving of her actions.

There is no doubt in my mind that if Lily had still failed as artist but just found a man in San Francisco, she wouldn't have gone back to Marshal.

Let's not forget that when Marshal finally leaves and is finding joy and happiness in a new job and opportunity, Lily can't handle a couple of days of being supportive to the point she nearly gets on a plane, without telling Marshal, to take a personal vacation

“Her art is ASS!”

Let's also not forget that the ONE time Marshall asks Lily to put her dreams on hols so he could fulfill his life long dream, Lily had the audacity to tell him that SHE always made sacrifices for him and HE never sacrificed anything.

“Don’t no men want Lily other than Marshall”